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Transcription:Robot Chicken Telethon
the set of the Robot Chicken Telethon set, Fidel Castro, Six Million Peso Man, Humping Robot, Bloopers Host, Mad Scientist, Little Drummer Boy, Eagle-Eye Smith, Robot Chicken, Lammy, Parappa, Sunny Funny, Katy Kat, PJ Berri, Mary Melody, Dot, Alien, and Nerd are all seated with telephones. Seth Green and Matthew Senreich are also present. They chat quietly, then turn to the camera. Seth Green: Welcome to the Robot Chicken Telethon, I'm Robot Chicken executive producer Seth Green. Matthew Senreich: And I'm Robot Chicken executive producer Matt Senreich. Seth: Not enough of you have been calling in to support us getting a third season, but we're gonna change all that right now! Co-head writer Douglas Goldstein, bring out that adorable puppy. (Douglas Goldstein enters the set with a puppy, happily barking) So listen carefully, if you guys don't call the number on the bottom of the screen right now, (Matt brandishes a double-barrelled shotgun) Matt here is gonna shotgun-blast Snuckles' brains all over the ground, you got it? So start calling, bitches! We're not kidding! You have two minutes to ca- (gets cut off when Matt accidentally shoots and kills Snuckles) Holy s**t! (to Matt) ''What the f**k?! '''Matt': (sheepish) Sorry, my finger slipped. My bad. Seth: (whispering) Matt, I thought we weren't gonna kill the dog! Matt: (whispering) Dude, it slipped. I'm sorry. exits, dragging Snuckles' corpse along. Seth: Wow! Okay, um, (thinks for a second, then gets another idea) let's, uh, let's have co-head writer Tom Root bring out Arnold the monkey. (whispering to Matt) Matt, you really gotta be careful, OK man? Matt: OK, OK, OK. Root enters the set with Arnold, a screeching monkey who jumps about. Seth: (grabbing Arnold and trying to calm him down) Arnold! Arnold, it's OK, it's OK, it's OK! Shhhhhh. It's OK buddy, it's OK. C'mere, it's OK. OK, now let's get some phone calls - (gets cut off again when Matt shoots Arnold dead) S**t! Matt, what the hell?!? Matt: Somebody put Vaseline on this trigger. Seth: Dude, I put a $10,000 deposit down on that monkey! I'm not gonna get that back! Matt: I'm really, really sorry. Seth: Give me the gun. Matt: No! two start struggling for the shotgun. Seth: Give me it! Matt: No, let go! Seth: Matt, give me it - (Matt accidentally shoots the Bloopers Host, decapitating him) Bloopers Host: (decapitated head bounces off the Humping Robot) Oh! Hello! and Matt stop struggling. Seth: MATT! You-you shot the Bloopers host! telephones start ringing, and the various characters answer them. Matt: Seth, listen. Nerd: Hey, would you like flies with that? Matt: They like the violence. We need more violence! (shoots Tom in the head, causing it to explode in a bloody manner) Seth: WHOA! Whoa, whoa! Matt, that's our friend Tom! He's - What are you doing!? We-we can't have a third season if we don't have any writers! Matt: They love us! (shoots all the Robot Chicken characters dead) Violence!! Ratings!! Come on!! Higher ratings!! Seth: Stop! Matt: What a world!! Die!! to a picture of the Stoopid Monkey covered in video tape, with the message "Please stand by. We are experiencing technical difficulties." Then cut back to the Telethon, as Seth and Matt once again struggle for the shotgun. Matt gets the upper hand and hits Seth with the shotgun butt. Matt: Die! (shoots him in the head, blowing it off in a gory fashion, and finally, shoots the camera. Cut back once again to the Stoopid Monkey.) Robot Chicken Telethon